It's been a while since I have written a blog post. Life with a one year old gets super busy!  I'm so thankful for it! P brings me so much joy during the day! She keeps me laughing! I feel like she is beginning to really understand what I am saying when I talk to her. Some of her favorite words/phrases are:
What's that?
Puppy
A shoe (While holding a shoe)
Woof woof, oink oink (and other animal noises)
Whoa
More please (pees)

 She talks all the time. Some of it are words and some are what she thinks are words. I can tell she is trying to communicate through words because she will point to things while talking in her own language. She is such a blessing!

July started year three of the grieving process. I feel in some ways that this has been one of the harder years. I would have thought by this point we would be good to go but I don't want that. I want to miss my Savannah and think about her every day (in a healthy way of course). I wish Penelope had her big sister here to play with. They would have had such good times together.

As the weather changes from warm to cold every year, I feel sad when I think about Savannah's little 19 pound body being buried in the ground without someone to keep it warm. I thought I was alone in this thinking, and some of you may think I'm crazy, but as I read a blog post from Nancy Guthrie as she spoke about having similar feelings for her sweet daughter that she had to bury at 6 months old, I was glad to know I'm not alone. My motherly instinct wants to make sure she is warm and well cared for but I remember that she is not in the grave but present with The Lord! She is not cold bc it's cold outside but is complete and joyful in the presence of The Lord. At church on Sunday, we sang the song "On Jordan's Stormy Banks". This verse stood out to me as I was struggling with these thoughts:

No chilling winds nor poisonous breath
Can reach that healthful shore
Sickness and sorrow, pain and death,
Are felt and feared no more.

Please keep praying for us and those around you who are grieving that we will keep trusting in The Lord and that God will continue to give us grace and peace!

Little man is due in 2 months. It has gone by quickly and we still have so much to do like pick a name! Hopefully we will decide on one soon!

Thanks for reading!

Sisters

When I took this picture of Penelope today, I thought she looked a lot like Savannah.  I found a picture of Savannah around the same age that Penelope is now and wow, they do look alike. 

The first picture is Penelope and the second picture is Savannah.

Just Like Her Sister

When Savannah was around 6 months old, I "caught" her rummaging through one of her cloth bins and it was super cute.  Here are some pictures:

Someone is just like her big sister:

Penelope at 6 Months

I can't believe my little girl is already 6 months old.  I feels like I just brought her home from the hospital.  Then, I think about all we have done since she is born (repairs on the house, house on the market, under contract, more repairs, packing, moving, etc) and I can't believe it has only been 6 months!  What a wonderful six months it has been.  Penelope is so active and happy.  She will smile at you if you look at her.  She laughs and absolutely loves to play with her Little People toys.  She is trying to crawl.  While sitting up, she lunges forward to get on her tummy.  If I put a toy just out of reach, she will stretch and roll and push off with her toes until she gets the toy.  Nothing really gets her down.  She even goes to sleep well (most times, just starting a week ago).  Sometimes, if she is really tired, she will fall asleep while sitting up. 

One funny thing she does is when it comes to eating her solid food.  She will be completely fine and content playing, etc and I will pick her up to put her in the high chair and she starts crying because she just realizes how hungry she was.  I can't get the food in her fast enough.  It cracks me up.  I love her so much and am so thankful the Lord blessed us with her.  We enjoy every day and try to make the most out of every day. 

Please continue to pray against anxiousness for us with her.  We have done ok, by God's grace, so far.  On Sunday morning (around 4 am) we had a false alarm with the Angelcare monitor.  I woke up to the alarm going up notifying us that there was no movement coming from the crib.  Eric ran in her room and realized she was ok.  We checked her out and made sure she was reacting well and she was fine thankfully.  We got back to bed around 6 am.  It was hard putting her back in the bed but some things you just have to do and trust that the Lord is in control.  That was one of the scariest things I have experienced.

We had three more false alarms and after some research, decided to turn up the sensitivity control on the monitor.  Because of her moving around the crib, I think she might have been getting too far away from the sensor pad making it not pick up her breathing.  We haven't had any more false alarms and as far as I know, it is working correctly.  I know that seems really stressful but I rather have a false alarm than to not have an alarm at all.  So, please continue to pray for us.  We are so appreciative of your love and prayers, even now, 16 months after we lost our sweet Savannah.

Here are some pictures of Penelope (via Photo Booth) on her 6 month birthday!

God remembers us, even in the small things

Savannah Grace's room was very bright and cheery.  It had 3 yellow walls and a hot pink wall.  It had a mural painted on the hot pink wall that had Alice in wonderland, Corduroy, Max from Where The Wild Things Are, Winnie the Pooh, and the Velveteen Rabbit.  It had a beautiful little chandelier that tied the room together perfectly.  When we went under contract (for selling the house), the chandelier was still hanging up in the room meaning we could not take it with us.  The last night we were in our house (before we made the big move) we debated on whether or not to take down the chandelier so I could have it to put in Penelope's room in our new house.  We knew the person buying our house would most likely take it down and probably sell it or get rid of it somehow.  It would mean nothing to them but we knew the rules for being under contract and it was already late and we would have had to find something to put up to replace the light, so we decided to leave it.  Eric told me he would get Penelope one similar to that one.  I was ok with that and we left it behind.

About a month later, Eric went up to Raleigh to help a family who was also moving down here with us.  He drove up on a Sunday night, spent the night, then helped pack that family up and came back down on Monday night.  It was late when Eric got in, so I was already in bed.  I was awoken by a big box being laid on my stomach.  I woke up and saw Eric there and had a confused look on my face.  It was Savannah's chandelier!!!

What happened was, we left our cookie sheets under our stove (in Raleigh), so the person who bought the house called our realtor and told him about it.  One of our friends went to pick them up for us and the new owners had taken down the chandelier and asked if we wanted that as well.  All I can say is that was a sweet blessing from the Lord.  God not only takes care of us in the big things but in the little things as well.

Here are some pictures of the chandelier: 

The Mural!!!

 

 The chandelier against the hot pink and yellow wall.

Pumpkins, Year 3

Every Halloween, since having children, I paint a picture on a pumpkin the same as that particular child's Halloween costume.  With Savannah's pumpkin, I have to be creative and choose something that I think she would have had fun dressing up as.  I chose a zebra for her.  Penelope was a Pumpkin this year.

Penelope and I went trick or treating with some friends.  Unfortunately, Sweet P slept the whole time we trick or treated.  We only ended up with a couple of small bags of candy corn and a tootsie roll pop.  It was still super fun!  Here are a few pictures from the Halloween season.

           Savannah's pumpkin and her favorite bunny at Lake Robinson.

 

Another picture of Savvy G's pumpkin.

                                   Penelope and Savannah's pumpkins at Lake Robinson.

                                                  Penelope in her pumpkin costume.

                                                     P chilling with her pumpkins.

                                              Sweet P with her Halloween candy!

A Quick Update

I just realized that it has been a while since I posted a blog.  With a young baby, things get really busy around the house.  Penelope Ann is such a sweet girl.  She is super laid back and such a joy.  Most nights, she sleeps all the way through.  I usually put her in bed for the last time for the night around 10  pm and she will sleep until 7 or 8 am.  Occasionally she wakes up around 4:30, but not a lot.  Nights and naps are really hard for me.  She sleeps in the pack and play right beside the bed.  I find myself waking up several times at night to make sure she is breathing.  During naps, I go check on  her every 5-10 minutes.  I'm not sure if I will ever stop doing that.  Whenever we move her to her crib, I have an Angel Care monitor that I can use.  It detects movement, so if your baby stops breathing, an alarm will go off.  Something you can pray for is for my anxious heart.  Pray that I will trust the Lord with her little life and remember that nothing will happen to her that isn't in God's plan.

On July 24th, we remembered Savannah's life.  We went to story time at Barnes and Noble.  The lady read a Fancy Nancy book.  During the story, a little boy walked up on the stage (as the kids always do), but he had a little accident while up there.  I told Eric that the kids come for the story, but the parent's entertainment is in watching the kids.  They are so funny.  When I used to take Savannah, she wouldn't really be interested in the book.  Since she had a love for chairs, she would try to climb into a chair even if there was a kid already sitting in it.  Haha!  I showed Eric the chairs that Savannah used to climb into.  After that, we went to Chick-fil-a, which is what Savannah and I (and friends) would do after story time.  It was really fun to get out and do something to remember Savannah.  It was a hard day.  Here are a few pics from our adventure.

Penelope is so wonderful.  She smiles really big when you look at her or talk to her.  A lot of times, she sits with her hands clasps together.  The other day, she realized that she has feet.  She kept looking at them.  She was probably thinking, "Where did those come from?"  She worked really hard at rolling over today.  She will be doing that soon.  She rubs her eyes when she is tired, which is so sweet.  She started to play with toys.  I love it when there are toys around the house.  With a baby, or with kids in general, there are a lot of things that they need which makes it hard to keep the house clean.  I wouldn't trade it for anything.  I try to straighten/wash everything while she naps or after she goes to bed but I love that there are toys to pick up and bottles to wash, etc.

Thank you so much for your continued prayers over the past year.  Please continue to pray.  We need it!  Love you all!